How to Choose the Perfect Ring for You!

Congratulations! You have decided you are ready to buy yourself a ring. Rings are a great way to feminize you hands. As a crossdresser, it is important that your choice compliments and enhances your appearance, rather than drawing undo attention to you. With thousands and thousands of choices, how do you decide upon The One? How do you choose the perfect ring?

Dainty Rings for Dainty Hands

As a crossdressing male, odds are that your hands are bigger than the average female’s. Because of this, larger hands are a giveaway to your maleness when dressed as a female, just as your facial features are. Properly chosen rings and earrings can do a lot to help with your appearance.

It is common for a crossdresser to apply makeup to his face to lessen the impact of those facial features. The goal is to draw attention away from your maleness. In the same way, you want to do this with your larger hands.

To choose the perfect ring, the first inclination may to wear really dainty rings. These scream femininity. Despite the temptation, I recommend against it (at least in public). The reason is the smallness of these dainty rings exaggerate the larger size of your hands.

Rings are too small for the size of Sami’s hand.

Here is a picture of me wearing a couple of dainty rings. One is a gold solitaire featuring a small pearl and two tiny diamond accents. The other is a narrow sterling silver band. You’ll notice the size of my hand overpowers these rings. My larger hand makes these dainty rings look smaller than they would on a female hand.

With them looking out-of-place, now people looking at you are wondering what isn’t quite right. We don’t want them to start down that path, so it is better to leave those dainty rings at home.

Rings sized in correct proportion to Sami’s hand.

Bigger Rings for Bigger Hands

Compare the first picture to the this one. Here I have switched the pearl solitaire with a filigree ring featuring a large amethyst stone. On the other finger I have added four more thin bands to the first, stacking them together. In summary, having the larger rings make them accessories that don’t look out-of-place for the size of hand.

Sami wearing wide silver bands

Bigger Ring with a Wider Band

Many crossdressers choose the perfect ring by going with a wider band. These are much easier to find in larger sizes. Both of the rings in the picture are sterling silver. One is a band composed of smaller circles, and the other is a single band cut to look like there are three bands touching each other.

The one thing you must consider with a wider band is that the needed size is about 1/2 size larger than that needed for a ring with a small band. This is because wider bands are harder to slide over knuckles than smaller bands. Learn more about this by reading the article on how to find your ring size.

Sami wearing rings with narrow bands and larger stones

Choose the Perfect Ring with a Large Stone

Here I am wearing a couple of rings with large stones. Both have narrow sterling silver bands. The stone on one is pear-shaped, while the other is a large faceted green stone. I had the green ring custom sized by a vendor on eBay.

Although you may not choose these exact styles, what is important here is the proportion. Although you don’t need a ring as large as the one on my middle finger, you do need it large enough so that others won’t see that large hand.

Sami wearing a ring with a cluster of smaller stones

Bigger Ring with a Large Cluster of Smaller Stones

I don’t have many rings with a large clusters of smaller stones. However, I plan to practice what I preach and get a few more rings that have clusters of stones. You can see me wearing one that has a medium-sized onyx surrounded by eight very small marcasite stones.

Choose the perfect ring - an engagement ring!
Engagement Style Ring

Some crossdressers choose the perfect ring by selecting an engagement ring that has clusters of stones around it. Wearing one on your left ring finger gives the impression that you are already married. This picture illustrates such a possibility. It has a medium-size cubic zirconia stone nestled between two smaller triangle-shaped stones. Notice the filigree heart under the larger stone. This looks very feminine but is still large enough that it looks great on the larger hands of a crossdresser.

For the Metal, Make a Solid Choice

The number one rule of buying rings is never to buy a plated or filled ring, because the thin layer of metal eventually wears thin. At that point, there is nothing between your skin and the filler metal. Often that turns your finger green under the ring.

As long as you remember the number one rule, you can use just about any type of metal. Here is a list of a few.

What Metal Should You Choose?

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  • Sterling Silver is a very popular choice. It is a great whitish color, and it is one of the more affordable options. On the other hand, it does have a couple of negatives. First, it tarnishes over time. Some people like the tarnished look, called patina. If you don’t like it, you can buy an inexpensive silver polishing cloth to give it some shine when needed. Sterling silver also tends to bend to conform to the underlying shape of your finger. It isn’t too bad, but if it bothers you, you can get the ring reshaped at a jeweler, or try using a ring mandrel and soft mallet to reshape it yourself.
  • Gold is a wonderful choice for a ring, especially ones that have narrower bands. This is because it is very durable and holds its shape well. You can get yellow or white gold. I recommend yellow gold over white because white requires plating with rodium. This wears well but eventually requires replating by a jeweler. Gold is also very expensive compared to sterling silver, so save it for a look you love!
  • Stainless steel is sometimes used for bands. It is very durable, looks like silver, and is inexpensive. It is a great metal to use for experimenting with wide bands, as they are more easily available for larger-sized fingers. I have a couple, and they still look fantastic!

Now the Search Begins to Choose the Perfect Ring!

In summary, this article should give you a great foundation for starting your search for the perfect ring. By now, you should have some ideas about the personality you want your ring to portray. First, are you choosing a dainty band with lots of gemstones, or one with a wider band? Are you looking for a large solitaire stone, or a cluster of smaller stones? Finally, will you choose the perfect ring made of sterling silver or move up to gold?

There are many choices to make. To choose the perfect ring, I recommend spending some time browsing eBay, Etsy, and Amazon for more ideas. Also, feel free to leave comments if you have further questions.

xoxoxo Sami

p.s., Here are some of my other popular How To Guides. Enjoy!

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Posted by Sami

Sami has been a part-time crossdresser for about 5 years. Although she still has a lot to learn herself, she is enjoying teaching new crossdressers tips that will hopefully help them on their adventure.
Besides enjoying her time with her family and working as a web developer, Sami loves to travel, make home improvements, and create jewelry in her spare time.
Read more about Sami by clicking her name.

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